We Are Family


I was going to post this for Wordless Wednesday, y’all. But then I decided I had to add a few words.

This is “Pop Pop Jeff” with his new love, Freya. From the expression on his face, you would never guess that she is not his real grand daughter. Her father is my son, from my first marriage. When Jeff and I got married, my son Ryan was already in his twenties, so it’s not like he and Jeff ever bonded as step dad and step son, exactly.

In fact, I would have to admit that there have been a few rocky patches between them. Let’s just say they have not always seen eye to eye. It has gotten better through the years. They still aren’t madly in love with each other, but this baby sure hasn’t done anything to make the situation worse.

Thank God that Jeff would never consider not loving my grandchild.

When Jeff and I got married, I was already in my forties, and unable to have any more children. I felt kind of bad for Jeff, because he only had a five year old daughter at the time, and I’m sure he would have loved to have another child. We got a puppy, and she became the child we take care of together. But in the back of my mind, I was hoping for the day that we would have grandchildren together. I figured it would be the next best thing.

And I was right.

I smile to myself whenever Jeff talks about how he and Freya have “already bonded.” Whenever he holds her, she just lights up. She studies his face as if she is trying to remember him from somewhere – and maybe she is.

I love the fact that he treats her like she belongs to him. I love the fact that she has brought our family full circle. I love the fact that my son has proven to be one of the most loving fathers either of us have ever seen. I love the fact that Jeff says Ryan reminds him of himself, when he first had Danielle.

I love the fact that a tiny baby can work miracles without even trying. She has turned both daddy and Pop Pop into quivering bowls of jello. She has made the two of them have something in common. She has made the two of us into grandparents.

We are no longer just “Ryan’s mom” and “Danielle’s dad.” We are no longer just “stepmom” and “stepdad.” We are Freya’s grandparents.

And that feels so good.

We also have another little miracle on the way. My oldest son, Kyle, is having a son. So Pop Pop and I will have one of each. Granddaughter. Grandson. Family.

10 thoughts on “We Are Family

  1. I know exactly what you mean, because Little Guy is not my biological grandson, and to say his mother and I have not always seen eye-to-eye is like saying the Grand Canyon is just a big hole in the ground.

    But none of that matters, because Little Guy is OUR grandson. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

  2. This is such a great picture! I totally get this post because I too remarried in my 40’s with grown children. Children really do work miracles…especially when they come in the form of grandchildren. They make us family because they don’t follow the rules or discrimanate…they just know the people that love them.

    I really loved this post. It made me smile and very thankful for both of us! And of course for Jan who recently joined our grandma club and knows all about familys like ours!

  3. This made me cry. My life has been so up and down lately with my own spouse and our struggles as a step family–which never seemed to happen until lately and honestly, I am not even sure it is about BEING a step family as much as just BEING a family.

    We do have a child together but I just reading your post made me realize that it WILL get better.

  4. I completely second that emotion! Nothing like grand-babies! It does bring it full circle. The fact that their family is also blended will add even more appreciation to that little fact. But the bottom line is the Lil Guy! Can’t wait to see him again!

  5. Paul and I have a beautifully blended family……I tell people when necessary that I have two stepchildren but five grandchildren. I claim the grands. And don’t try to tell any of them that I’m NOT their grandmother!

    Congratulations on all the love in your family.

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