The Big Hurt

Today’s topic on The Daily Post is “What’s going on in your life right now that’s driving you nuts?”

Right away, the wise folks at WordPress qualify this with a warning about venting about people in your life. They advise us not to give names or descriptions of people we’re venting about because they could read our blog and get angry.

Well, that kind of makes it impossible to do, y’all.

I would love to blog about what is driving me crazy, making me angry, making my eyelids twitch, causing me to wake up in the middle if the night and not get back to sleep, breaking my heart, worrying me to death and pretty much making me feel ignored, discarded, unappreciated and used.

But then, all you moms out there probably have already figured it out. There’s only one relationship in our life that has the capacity to hurt us this way, right?

This morning I find myself missing my grandmother, and wishing I could talk all of this over with her. Somehow, I know she would have the right words to say. I know she would have words of advise about why mothers have to endure hurts like this. She would give me hope by telling me a few stories of her own problem, and how they were resolved.

Or, maybe she would read to me one of her many poems. Like this one.

“If”

If I had a million bucks
Or thousands – just a few
I would never hesitate,
I’d divide it all with you.

If I won the Nobel Prize
And that I’ll never do
But, if it really came about
You’d be honored too.

If I had just one wish
And knew it would come true
I’d wish for health and happiness
And share it all with you.

Health and happiness – magic words.
Sometimes hard to find
Often when needing them,
They’re right there in our mind.

So many ifs in our lives
Only dreams, its true
But honest – if “ifs” happened
My thoughts would be of you.

My thoughts are with you today,  my special someone who is driving me crazy right now, and I would give anything to be able to talk to you. Since I can’t, I will dedicate Grandmama’s poem to you. Remember what she told you the last time you saw her?

“Just be good to one another.”

I will always love you, no matter what. You know who you are.

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Then and Now: 1958 and 2010

This week’s Spin Cycle topic is Then and Now. Last week it was Collages.

I missed last week’s Spin Cycle. In fact I have missed a bunch of week’s ya’ll. I’ve been in a funk like that. This whole blogging thing is inconsistent for me. I’ve noticed a whole lot of blogs (that I used to follow on an admittedly inconsistent basis) have completely turned off the lights. Gone away.

But I digress. This week, I am participating, hopefully not too late. And I’m going to present a couple of collages here too, for good measure! You can click on the collages to make them bigger.

 

This is a Collage of a bunch of very old pictures. In fact, over fifty years old. This is me, back when I was little and cute:

My granddaughter, Freya, is about the same age now, that I was over fifty years ago. This Collage is of her:

Am I the only one here who thinks she looks like me?

You Capture Quiet

I’ve been trying to participate in a photo forum on Thursdays. Brought to us by I Should Be Folding Laundry (me too, by the way), it’s called You Capture. Every week there is a new theme. This week’s is “Quiet.”

I’ve been real quiet lately, y’all.

If you are one of the handful of folks that regularly visit my blog, you will note that I haven’t blogged anything since February 23rd.  That’s fifteen days, to be exact.

If it sounds like I’m feeling sorry for myself, I am.

The truth is…I’ve been sad. I’ve had nothing to say. What is there to say when it feels like your whole life has been turned upside down?

I’ve had a hard time getting a handle on things.

In fact, right now, just sitting here typing this, I feel like I might throw up.

So I’ll just come out with it.

Another grandchild is moving away. My grandson, Kole, is moving to Seattle, Washington. That’s three thousand miles away from me.

His parents have their reasons. And I’ll adjust to it. Sometime. Someday. Maybe.

But right now I’m just going to be quiet. Right now I’m just going to be sad.

I’m mourning the loss of being able to see this precious face on a regular basis. To see him growing up, doing the day to day, ordinary things that babies do.

I have one more month with him. I’m not going to be around a lot, because I want to spend as much time as possible with my little Kole, and his parents, as I can before they go.

When, and if, I ever feel like myself again, I’ll get back to blogging, y’all.

Gettin’ Old is Scary, Y’all

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This week’s Spin Cycle topic is Halloween.

This is a picture of my friend, Debbie, and I. We don’t really look like this, although there are days when I fell pretty darn close to it. She and her husband came to visit us last October, and we had fun wearing these masks while we rode around town and waved at folks out the window.

I know. Sad what amuses us old women, isn’t it?

 

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My dear Grandmama Gladys passed away last year on October 23, the week after this photo was taken. She was a prolific writer. She wrote poetry and her life story, which I love to use whenever I just don’t have time to be original highlight every now and then.

I also have another blog, which is dedicated to her. It’s called The Rock of Gibraltar. I know she would have loved blogging, if only the internet had been invented a few decades sooner!

When she was in her 90’s, she wrote a new poem every month for her community news letter. Even at her advanced age, she was a stickler for making sure her work was “just so”. I can’t begin to tell you how many times my mother, who served, among other duties, as her typist, was told to redo the whole poem, because Grandmama had discovered a typo!

This is one of her poems she wrote for the newsletter. Since I can’t hold a candle to a ninety-something woman have to work all weekend, I’m going to let Grandmama fill in for me.

OCTOBER DAYS

Winter is coming – its getting cold.
Pumpkins are turning reddish-gold.
And on this colorful October day
Yellow and gold are on display.

It is a wonderful sight
Pumpkins are waiting for candle lights.
And when the children pick one out,
This is it, they always shout!

Pumpkin pie and whipped cream
Are many folks fondest dream.
But children would rather have in place
A silly cut-out pumpkins face.

Halloween comes at last
And at the door with gruesome masks
Are goblins, witches and ghostly things
And “trick or treat” a familiar ring.

This brings memories of the past
But childhood days never last.
We are older and already gray
Giving all the treats away.
Age brings a new kind of joy
Watching the happiness of girls and boys.

Gladys Parker
October 2002

If Tomorrow Comes…

Thanks to my friend, Jan, over at Jan’s Sushi Bar, I’ve decided to give this here posting every day thing a try, y’all. It’s called NaBloPoMo,and I can’t believe how long it just took me to write that. Stands for “National Blog Posting Month”. You post something every day for a month.

It’s ridiculously hard ….damn near impossible….a monumental task on the weekends..the biggest challenge of my life so far….can we just say only seven days left?…almost over and I have really, really run out of things to saybecome the bane of my existenceworse than I ever imagined it would be…forcing me to dig deep these last few days.

The theme of this was supposed to be “tomorrow”, but really, how much can you say about something that’s never here, is not guaranteed to arrive, and yet, the whole reason most of us keep getting up every day. See? It’s not like just posting your recipe for making sweet ice tea, y’all.

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This little cutie pie is my granddaughter, Freya. I’m just going to blatantly cheat today and post a poem that my grandmother wrote about baby smiles, miles, gloom, shadows, God, tomorrow and time.

She would have adored this face, God love her.

TIME

Enjoy the times a little child smiles
Or old folks running their healthy miles.
Take time to smell flowers in bloom.
Look into the shadows – cast out the gloom.

Time is precious and time will tell
If its used wisely and used well.
Sometimes its wasted – that is sad!
One life lived is the time we had.

Our God created everything.
Take time to worship – His praises sing.
If tomorrow comes, what will you do?
Waste not the time that comes to you.

Gladys Parker
Sept. 2000

I Heart My Grandmama

Thanks to my friend, Jan, over at Jan’s Sushi Bar, I’ve decided to give this here posting every day thing a try, y’all. It’s called NaBloPoMo,and I can’t believe how long it just took me to write that. Stands for “National Blog Posting Month”. You post something every day for a month.

It’s ridiculously hard ….damn near impossible….a monumental task on the weekends..the biggest challenge of my life so far….can we just say only seven days left?

Yesterday was the last day of our Staycation. We spent it at the beach. Last night we went downtown and took some pictures at Battleship Park, where the kids of One Tree Hill practice basketball, and had dinner at Front Street Brewery.

Since I don’t have much time before we leave for New York, to take the girls home today, I decided to participate in this photo meme.

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This week’s photo challenge theme on I Heart Faces is nostalgia. Any photo, with a face of course, that brings back feelings of nostalgia. This photo is my Grandmama Gladys. It was taken on her 94th birthday. Last year, when she was 96, she succmbed to congestive heart failure and died in October. It makes me feel nostalgic when I look at this picture, and remember how happy she was on that day.

I miss her terribly.

The straw hat belonged to my older son, Kyle. I was fooling around, trying to get a good picture of this bent over little lady, who was so dear to my heart, but who didn’t always, at 94, have the energy left to show us that little light inside of her heart. On a whim, I stuck this straw hat on her head. Instead of scolding me for “messing up her hair and acting foolish”, which I expected, she burst into this radiant grin.

I thinks she was happy to be the center of our attention that day. Even if it meant sacrificing her proper hair do.

I Heart Faces is a photography sharing forum that focuses on the art of capturing faces and their various emotions. Each week, people from across the world enter their favorite face photos. A judge picks a winning photo from each category that is displayed on the I Heart Faces page.

Click on the button to check out lots of other nostalgic faces, or to enter a photo of your own.

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